Overcome Your Fears and
Change Your Life

by Joan Borysenko, PhD

Recently, a client of mine named Gail was downsized out of her job. At first, she was afraid of not being able to make a living. But within a year she opened her own firm, and now she’s the boss. We all know stories like hers—when life changes for the better after we’re evicted from our comfort zones. Here are some tips to help you overcome fear and inertia and embrace change more willingly:

1. Understand the gifts of change: In one year, Gail found strength, resourcefulness, and resiliency that she didn’t know she had. We all grow emotionally, creatively, and spiritually through a three-stage process called a rite of passage. We undergo separation from the old life, a liminal period of not knowing what’s next, and finally we return strengthened and transformed. Rising to a challenge and finding meaning in it is a particular gift of being human.
2. Let go: It’s important to grieve what was, but then let go. Reflection and silence can quiet the mind and allow new ideas to surface. After her job evaporated, Gail started frantically searching for a new position. Finally, she realized she needed time to rest to avoid making decisions out of worry and stress. This is like letting a field lie fallow to ensure its continued fertility. The seed that sprouted for Gail was the vision of owning her own business.
3. Follow your vision: Courageous people aren’t fearless. They just take action in spite of their fears. Working creatively to cope with unexpected change, or to make needed changes when we feel stuck, is a validation of the reality that our potential for both work and love is much vaster than we imagine.

Arrangements for the appearance of Joan Borysenko made through BigSpeak, Inc., Santa Barbara, CA, www.BigSpeak.com.